Sunday, 22 March 2009

Detoxing & de-friending?

After writing my last blog I thought I really must detox, so naturally I spent that evening eating up the crisps & biscuits in my house. After all, they don't sit quietly in the cupboard and the only way I can cut them out from my diet, is not to have them in the house, and throwing them out is just wasteful! Obviously, J has to be cut out too, I know that, but my head has never ruled my heart where he is concerned. Just for a while, as I do not want to lose him as a friend because he is a lovely person, but I must regain perspective and hopefully some sense as far as he's concerned. I need to regain me instead of being part of an "us".

On another track, what a strange life I lead. Why do I say that? Well, I need to renew my passport, not because it's expiring, but because I'm almost out of pages. So today I was looking through the form and I need someone to co-sign, and that someone has to be a British citizen and has known me over two years. Therein lays the problem. Now, many of my friends are Italian, Australian, French etc and those that are British either are not currently around Muscat or have not known me two years. It doesn't take much to realise how transitory friends & acquaintances are in the expat world. People who come into our lives, share a portion of it, then move on, are the norm. Those people may or may not keep contact with us, especially with social devices like facebook at our disposal.

Like detoxing the body of excesses of modern life, do us expats need &/or want to keep in touch with these people? Once you move to a new country or even continent is it expedient to keep contact? Now, facebook & sites like it in some ways are a get-out as you can keep people in your friend's list, you can kid yourself you are still in contact, but really is sending a "hi" via their wall keeping in touch? Isn't it more honest to de-friend these people who you will never meet again? Obviously, for those of you who do not frequent the expat world you do not have this same problem of transitory friends, however what about that couple you met on holiday 10 years ago and send a Christmas card to? Or worse, there's that spotty guy from junior school who contacted you through Friends Reunited that you had and have nothing in common? Do you really need/want these people in your life? Will I be going through my facebook friend list or my email contacts and de-friending ex-friends? NO, because I hope one day someone will decide to get on a plane to revisit this old friend, or invite me to see them, or just reminisce about past times. Sentimental? Maybe, but I hope you my friends will continue to keep in touch even when time and distance physically parts us.